Ed and Betty Coda, the diocese’s primary “ministers” of Natural Family Planning, at their Honolulu office Oct. 26. (HCH photo | Darlene Dela Cruz)
Family planning the natural way helps couples conceive, or avoid pregnancy, while strengthening their marriages
By Darlene J.M. Dela Cruz
Hawaii Catholic Herald
“We’ve always seen it as a ministry.”
Ed Coda sits in a conference room at the Honolulu office of his family-run financial planning business. He and his wife Betty on Oct. 26 are taking time out of their day job to reflect on the other major work they’ve undertaken for the last three decades — teaching Natural Family Planning.
The Codas have been the primary “ministers” in the diocese spreading the good word of this safe, church-approved alternative to artificial birth control. Natural Family Planning, or NFP, helps couples plan the conception of children based on bodily cues and alternating periods of abstinence and intimacy.
To the Codas, it is a ministry to which they’ve gladly given their time as a way to share with others God’s purest intentions for marriages and families.
“Natural Family Planning is about love,” Betty Coda told the Hawaii Catholic Herald.
“It’s the God-centered choice,” her husband Ed added.
NFP is gaining renewed attention as the church continues its Year of the Family.
Collaborating with the creator
The Codas are involved with the Couple to Couple League, the largest provider of Natural Family Planning services in the U.S.
The Couple to Couple League website, www.ccli.org, explains Natural Family Planning as “fertility awareness,” which “honors our dignity as persons by respecting the natural rhythms and functions of the body.”
Teachings by Blessed Paul VI first inspired the work of the Couple to Couple League.
“The transmission of human life is a most serious role in which married people collaborate freely and responsibly with God the Creator,” wrote Pope Paul VI in his 1968 encyclical, “Humanae Vitae.”
The Couple to Couple League developed its “Sympto-Thermal Method” of NFP in consultation with an ob-gyn physician and professor from the University of Minnesota. The Sympto-Thermal Method is a joint effort by a married couple to monitor three phases of the female fertility cycle.
Two of those phases — before and after ovulation — are times of infertility. A woman learns the physical symptoms and body temperature milestones that determine whether she is or is not able to get pregnant.
Her spouse is responsible for logging these symptoms daily on paper charts or on the Couple to Couple League mobile app.
The couple then plans times of abstinence and intimacy according to their desire to have children.
Studies by P. Frank-Herrmann and other researchers determined a 99.6 percent effectiveness rate of NFP for couples who want to prevent pregnancy. Birth control pills rank with similar efficacy. Ed Coda explains, however, that NFP does not involve the harmful chemicals of artificial contraceptives.
“This is medical science at its best,” he said.
Other research cited by the Codas estimate an 88 percent success rate within six months for couples seeking to conceive through NFP.
The Codas highlight in their NFP classes the added benefit of a strengthened relationship between couples that use the Sympto-Thermal Method. Sharing the responsibility of charting, Betty Coda said, leads to better communication overall between husband and wife.
“It’s marriage-building,” she said.
The Codas’ story
Aaron and Kim Meyer, parishioners of St. Philomena Church in Salt Lake, enjoy a dinner at McDonald’s near the parish Oct. 29 with their three children Kealana, Lota and Kaliko. (HCH photo | Darlene Dela Cruz)
Ed Coda explains that Natural Family Planning is a way for couples to understand that marital love is a call “to imitate the love of the (Holy) Trinity.” This love, he said, is “free, total, faithful and fruitful.”
The Codas, who have been married for 46 years, became certified teachers of Natural Family Planning in 1982. They have six children — ages 32 to 42 — and nine grandchildren.
Ed read about the Sympto-Thermal Method while traveling in Chicago after Betty had given birth to their fifth child. The Codas shared this information with their doctor, who Betty said was “very affirming” of it.
A priest at Tripler Army Medical Center urged them to become certified NFP teachers so more faithful in the diocese would hear of its benefits. Since then, the Codas have held classes on Oahu, Kauai, Maui and the Big Island. They remain the only certified teachers of Natural Family Planning in Hawaii.
Ministering on marriage and family means a lot to the Codas. In 2011, they published a book called “Passionate Parent, Passionate Couple,” which received an endorsement by Bishop Larry Silva.
The Codas began their final round of NFP classes for this year on Oct. 28 at Damien Chapel in Schofield Barracks. A full series of classes entails three sessions, each running about two hours. The classes are spaced a month apart in order to give couples time to “practice” what they have learned.
For couples that cannot make it to these in-person meetings, Ed and Betty serve as “consultants” for connecting them with other Internet-based class options.
The Codas offer NFP classes at $140, which covers the cost of a kit that includes books, charts and a chance to retake courses if needed. The fee also covers supplemental classes on post-partum and pre-menopause family relations.
Ed and Betty will soon work out dates for the 2016 NFP classes. They hope more parishes will get involved and other couples will step up to be future facilitators.
“We really want to get other people trained,” Ed said.
Other couples’ stories
Roger and Anna Acebo of St. Joseph Church in Waipahu spend an afternoon at Pearl Ridge Center with kids Evan and Jessica Joy, Oct. 30. (HCH photo | Darlene Dela Cruz)
Two local Catholic couples that have taken the Natural Family Planning course said they would recommend it to others.
Aaron and Kim Meyer of St. Philomena Church in Salt Lake credit the Codas for helping them conceive their three children: daughters Kealana, 8, and Kaliko, 3, and son Lota, 6.
“Our family wouldn’t exist if it wasn’t for them,” Aaron Meyer said.
Kim Meyer explained that she and Aaron heard a parish announcement about NFP shortly after they were married. They ventured to the classes out of curiosity.
“We might as well see what it’s about,” Kim said.
Aaron said they “instantly fell in love” with the Codas, who “make everybody feel like family.” The Meyers appreciated their knowledge and openness about such a personal subject.
“They’ve got it down to a science,” Aaron said. “A lot of people see NFP as an old-school thing,” but “it’s a phenomenal practice.”
Natural Family Planning, he added, was the perfect alternative for the lifelong Catholic couple that “didn’t want to do things that were outside of our faith.”
Roger and Anna Acebo of St. Joseph Church in Waipahu took the Natural Family Planning courses for pastoral reasons.
As members of the parish team that handles marriage preparation and enrichment, the Acebos felt they should learn about NFP to see whether it is worth referring to other parishioners.
Anna Acebo said the NFP classes were to her and Roger a tangible way to see “the graces of marriage” as a sacrament.
“It strengthened our spirituality,” she said. “I don’t think just married or engaged people should take it, I think everybody should take it.”
Roger said they often encounter in their marriage ministry couples who “forget about God” during the initial stages of matrimony. The NFP courses can help them “build a foundation” on the church’s teachings about the true purpose of conjugal love.
“The more you find out, it makes more sense,” he said. “You have to live out your faith.”
For more information on Natural Family Planning, email Ed and Betty Coda at codafam@aol.com or call 839-0837.
