The married life
In God’s eyes, every child is precious, and every person has value. “Perfection” in the world’s view is evasive and rarely obtainable, as most Olympic athletes will acknowledge. In fact, it is often the beautifully imperfect whom God uses to bless a family.
When I was in grade school I had a friend, Pat, who was from a large Catholic family. For five years Pat and I attended the same Catholic school together. Sometimes I went to her house after school, and a few times I spent the night.
Pat’s older sister had severe Down syndrome and an inoperable heart condition, which made her lips and fingers turn blue. She could not speak well and often grunted.
At first I was frightened by her appearance and speech, but I soon saw how beloved she was to Pat and her family. Pat always greeted her sister with a big hug and kiss, and the entire family showered this girl with affection. It was obvious that love abounded because of this child, and she in turn radiated happiness with a big toothy smile.
Over time many of the children in that family had struggles, particularly during rough teen years. I had lost touch with Pat, but several years later my brother, who was a priest and chaplain at a large hospital, ran into Pat’s father again who was hospitalized and seriously ill. The father told my brother that in reflecting on his life, he realized that it was his Down syndrome daughter who had kept the family together during those hard years.
I have a cousin, Sue, who was born with the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck, which resulted in a brain injury. Although physically she appeared normal, Sue had significant developmental delays. She was high-functioning and learned to read and write at about the second-grade level. As an adult she worked at McDonald’s sweeping and cleaning. Sue is older now and lives with her brother and his family.
Every year, right on time, I get a birthday card from Sue, typically signed from “my kind and adorable cousin.” She retains the simplicity and affection of a child.
Coming from a large family, Sue was much loved by all. She has always been devout and goes to daily Mass. When Sue was a teenager her parents got divorced, largely because of issues with her father. It was very hard on the family. Sue decided at that time that she would live with her father, even though everyone else stayed with their mom, my aunt. Sue prayed for her father daily and was very loving to him. He began to change.
Eventually her father pursued religious instruction from a priest. To everyone’s surprise, he became a Catholic and was reconciled with his family.
He died from cancer a few years later, but my aunt said that the last two years of his life were the happiest he had ever known because of his newfound faith.
I attribute his conversion to my cousin with her example of childlike love and faith.
Jesus loves all his children. He sees the inside of the cup, not the outside. When these children are loved they are a gift to families and society, not a burden.
“And Jesus said, ‘I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me.’” (Mt. 18: 3-5)
