The Married Life
It’s good for parents to teach their children when they are young that it’s a loving thing to look out for other children who are not as fortunate as they are. My mother tried to instill this in my siblings and me, that sacrificing for the sake of others is important, especially when they don’t have the blessings we have.
We used to go to our grandparents’ home by Lake Michigan in the summer. It was a wonderful time for us. We went to the beach almost every day, and our grandparents hired a cook who fixed lunch and dinner.
The cook, Pat, was a great storyteller who kept us all amused with her many tales. We used to help in the kitchen just so we could hear her stories. That’s how I learned to set a table and clean up after meals.
Pat’s family was poor. Her husband had abandoned them when their youngest son, Archie, was born, and they subsisted on welfare and odd jobs.
The family lived in the basement of a house where the main house had been torn down. Pat said when it snowed you could see nothing but the chimney.
Summer was a time of respite for Pat. She had never been a cook before, but grandma taught her what to do, and she thrived in the kitchen, She was loved by us all.
Archie, meanwhile, was watched at home by his older sister. One day my mother suggested to Pat that she bring Archie with her to work and my mom would watch him for the day.
So the next day, 7-year-old Archie came to grandma’s house. He was a quiet, heavyset boy with reddish blond hair and freckles. He hardly spoke a word. He didn’t own a swimsuit, so he brought an extra pair of shorts to wear to the beach.
We were used to going to the beach every day, but it was obviously a new experience for Archie. He didn’t know how to swim, but he sure loved the water! He splashed around in the lake the entire day, and never wanted to get out of the water.
I had the impression that this was the first time he had ever been to the beach despite living only a couple miles away. I suspected it was the best day of his summer.
Just one day. Sometimes I used to wonder about all the other days. Was one day enough for Archie?
“Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere” (Ps 84:10).
Another year, when we were getting ready for our trip to Michigan, my mother spent the day with a friend who had a daughter about my age, who was an only child.
I had lots of brothers and sisters, and had no interest in playing with the girl, but my mother said, “Look, you are going to Michigan tomorrow, where you will have lots of fun. You can spend one day making this girl happy.”
So I played with the girl, telling her stories and rocking together on a hammock. I remember she laughed and laughed. I could tell she had a fun day. Making her happy brought me joy too. Even at a young age we have the ability to reach out to others. Sacrificing a little can go a long way.
I thought about the girl later and again wondered if one day made a difference. Mother Teresa said, “We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.”
Even if it’s just for one day, helping a child enjoy life is a gift our children can provide — sometimes with a little nudge from us.