Deacon Stephen Kula
A man known for his love of helping others, and his radiant humor
By Patrick Downes
Hawaii Catholic Herald
Deacon Stephen Kula, a man known for his joyful embrace of life and his generous spirit, died on Jan. 1 after decades of service as the head of health-related nonprofit organizations in Hawaii. He was 74 years old and a deacon for nine years.
According to Bishop Larry Silva, Deacon Kula died “immediately after assisting at (New Year’s Day) Mass at Holy Trinity Church,” the Honolulu parish to which he was assigned.
“I always thought of Deacon Steve Kula as a very wise man with a great sense of humor,” the bishop told the Hawaii Catholic Herald.
“His dedication as a deacon was admirable, and he and his wife Debbie were therefore chosen to serve on the core team for the formation of other deacons,” he said. “He had a spiritual depth and a caring spirit. He will be missed very much by all of us.”
Deacon Kula’s funeral is Feb. 3 at Holy Trinity Church with visitation at 9-10:30 a.m. and Mass at 11 a.m. The bishop will preside. Burial will be at a later date.
Holy Trinity pastor Capuchin Franciscan Father Michel Dalton said he has lost his “right-hand man” — liturgically, pastorally and as a friend.
He had a “radiance” in his smile and in his personality, he said.
“He loved life and loved being a deacon,” Father Dalton said. His work included visiting the women’s prison and directing the Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults (RCIA).
Father Dalton announced the death at Masses the following weekend. After a collective gasp, he said, parishioners have reacted with “sadness, sadness and more sadness.” By Monday of last week, at least 100 had signed up to volunteer to help at the funeral.
Deacon Kula’s diaconate classmate, Deacon Michael Weaver, said it is Kula’s cheerful outlook that will linger most in his memory.
“One of my favorite photos of Steve Kula shows he and I and his wife Debbie after Mass. We are all laughing,” he said.
“That is perhaps my strongest memory of Steve — laughter. When we were in formation together, Steve always found something to be happy about,” Weaver said. “Whether it was in regaling the group with stories of his time in the military or during what he jokingly referred to as his ‘misspent youth,’ or pulling out a small bottle of soapy water and blowing bubbles when classwork got to be stressful, Steve just always seemed to enjoy being alive.”
“And he truly, deeply loved the joy of being a deacon,” Weaver said. “He loved being around people, sharing their struggles, listening to their stories, and always finding some way to put a positive spin on things.”
Deacon Kula was born on Sept. 21, 1949, in Van Nuys, Calif., the youngest of four children of Frank and Elizabeth Kula. When he was 13, his family moved to Hawaii, where he attended Saint Louis School for one semester before transferring to Maryknoll, graduating in 1967.
After one semester at Chaminade University he enlisted in the U.S. Marine Corps serving in Vietnam.
Deacon Kula described his parents as “devout” Catholics, who brought the family to Mass weekly, and daily during Advent and Lent. He remembered saying the rosary as a family and serving as altar boy at the Stations of the Cross.
“The church has always been a part of my life,” he said.
In a “reflective autobiography” he wrote before his ordination he discussed his military service and his faith.
“As a Marine in Vietnam I learned a lot and questioned a lot, especially about my faith,” he said. “I was still a Catholic, but I questioned my faith in God and the beliefs that I grew up with. But through it all I became, with the help of my wife through her conversion, a better Christian.”
He and his wife Debbie grew up as next-door neighbors. “I treated her as my little sister until after Vietnam when I asked her to be my wife,” he said.
“She converted to Catholicism so that we could be married in the church and raise our family in our faith,” he said.
He saw his diaconate as answering a call that had lingered below the surface since grade school.
“As a young boy in grade school I was fascinated with the church,” he said. “I even joined the young priesthood club and contemplated attending the seminary, but things took a lot of different turns.”
He earned bachelor’s and master’s degrees from Colorado State University and a doctorate in business administration at Kennedy Western University in Cheyenne, Wyo.
In an article he wrote for the Hawaii Catholic Herald three years ago about his vocation, he said that as he got older, he became “very independent and strong-willed,” which prompted warnings from his father who told him to be more “like Jesus.”
The advice didn’t sink in until many years later.
“I realized what he was telling me. Jesus loved to do the unexpected. He enjoyed life to the fullest, having fun, enjoying eating, drinking, and telling stories with people, even while upsetting the powers that be. Even more, he loved to help people. That was exactly what I wanted to do with my life.”
“After some prodding and research, I realized, with the strong help and encouragement of my wife that becoming a deacon was what I should pursue,” he said.
He was ordained Jan. 31, 2015, in the Co-Cathedral of St. Theresa.
Before retiring in 2018, Deacon Kula was president and CEO for 11 years of Legacy of Life Hawaii, an organ procurement organization, formerly the Organ Donor Center of Hawaii. He was also executive director of The Arc in Hawaii for two and a half years, and president and CEO of Hospice Hawaii for 12 years.
He is survived by his wife Deborah, daughter Raechel, son Christopher, and four grandchildren, Lydia, Bradley, Noah and Madolyn.
Steve is also survived by his brother David and sister Leslie and many nieces and nephews.
