Here are ways during Lent to refrain from other appetites besides food which can help us prepare for the passion, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ
Abstaining from gossip
By Judith Weigand
Special to the Herald
The most successful and rewarding “fasting” I ever did for Lent was more than 60 years ago when I was a junior at Stanford University. That Lent I gave up gossiping.
Before Lent I let my fellow housemates know of my intentions and they thought it was hilarious. I never made a big deal about it, but when we were sitting around socializing or playing bridge, etc., and the gossip inevitably started, I quietly got up and left the room.
Less than a week into Lent, everyone was aware of what that meant, and gossip in general diminished a great deal. In addition, I began to have visits with some of my housemates who would ask if they could talk to me. That usually meant revealing some problem they were having, sometimes with a boyfriend. But two women told me that their fathers had sexually abused them. They said they needed to tell someone and they knew I would keep their confidences. In both those cases I suggested they seek counseling services from the university.
When Lent approached during my senior year, many of my housemates asked me to do the same thing, as it inspired them to stop gossiping as well.
Weigand is a Hawaii transplant, having retired here.
Solidarity fasting
By Father William Kunisch
Special to the Herald
At St. Anthony Parish in Kailua, we encourage parishioners to fast one meal every First Friday, even outside of Lent, to be in solidarity with the poor and those in need. We provide parishioners with a special envelope in their package for our First Friday Fast Fund in which they can donate the money saved.
This restricted fund is used to support local non-profits that care for the homeless, treat those with addictions, provide food for the hungry, give support to pregnant mothers, and help so many others in need in our community and globally. Our First Friday Fasts are a way of connecting our charity to a spiritual practice. It connects faith to real life and helps us cultivate the virtue of generosity.
This First Friday Fast is something that I started while pastor at Resurrection of the Lord Parish in Waipio. It was extremely helpful during the COVID-19 pandemic. We gave away thousands of dollars during that time to help local non-profits assisting people.
I actually got the idea when I was sitting next to a Mormon elder on a flight from Salt Lake City to Hawaii. He said that many Mormons fast on the first Monday of each month and the money saved is donated to their outreach fund. I thought it was a great idea! I just “Catholicized” it!
Father Kunisch is the pastor of St. Anthony in Kailua and the Diocese of Honolulu’s ecumenical/interfaith officer.
Dropping social media
By Allen Vincent
Special to the Herald
While social media started as a way to communicate and stay connected with people, smartphones have revolutionized it. We now have the world in our hands through a 6.2-inch device.
Social media has become an integral part of our lives and the very thought of staying away from it fuels FOMO (fear of missing out) on the latest trends and happenings.
But social media use can be just as addicting as alcohol, drugs, gambling or pornography. There is substantial evidence from researchers in the field of sociology, psychology and medicine that social media stimulates the chemical or neurotransmitter dopamine in the brain. Dopamine triggers feelings of pleasure that temporarily make a person feel good. The need to keep this feeling going can create an addictive cycle.
We want to make ourselves present in social media because we know that the whole world is just a tap on the screen away and we want to keep up with the trends, creating a vicious loop. We scroll through apps mindlessly, occasionally liking something that speaks to us or entertains us and then post something ourselves. Once we do that, we look forward to another person, also mindlessly scrolling, to like or retweet or comment on our post. Boom, the flow of dopamine is enormous when a notification brings in “joy.” The “rewards” of social media end up becoming our identity, and very soon we end up clinging to that version of ourselves.
I have not mentioned anything about Jesus, the season of Lent or anything regarding faith so far because I felt the need to highlight this major problem we’re faced with today. As God’s sons and daughters, we turn to him in this desperate situation.
Luke 9:23 is one of the many verses which challenge me in my journey of following Jesus: “If anyone wants to come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.”
As Christians, we are all called to follow Jesus. But to do that, we need to let go of our self-centeredness, which keeps us from focusing on the one true God. The act of self-denial, where I look for a close relationship with Jesus rather than myself, is the motivation required to fast from social media.
It is easier said than done and I know personally the urge to get back on is intense. But the constant reminder that we are called to follow Jesus and “engage” with him daily, is what we must really look forward to as we consider a social media fast this Lenten season.
I do not suggest completely wiping ourselves from social media since the need to communicate and stay in touch with loved ones across the country and the world is still important. However, moderating the use will certainly lower social media’s importance in our lives.
What helped me stay away from Facebook was simply deleting my account. This was a drastic step that I took seven years ago, but I do not regret it. The withdrawal symptoms were real, but I had my eye on the prize. I have three social media accounts now but keep my notifications off and set a 30-minute limit for all three apps combined. Once I hit 30 minutes, the phone locks my app access until the next day. I highly recommend using this feature in smartphones as it helped me a lot when I was first hooked on these sites. Did I have the urge to check the apps and my phone? Absolutely, but in the last year that I’ve had this routine, it’s become easier.
When we make a conscious effort to deny ourselves, it eventually helps us carry our crosses and follow Jesus. May this season of Lent be the season where we fast from clinging to our social media-derived identities and feast on the joy that comes from clinging to Jesus and the cross on which he suffered and died for us.
Allen Vincent is a chemistry graduate student at the University of Hawaii-Manoa and a parishioner at its Newman Center.
Changing the station
By Anna Weaver
Hawaii Catholic Herald
I didn’t consistently listen to Christian music in my car until I returned from covering World Youth Day 2008 in Sydney. Inspired by all I’d experienced there, including two mini-concerts by Catholic musician Matt Maher, I switched over more to the local Christian station and also downloaded some Christian artists onto my devices.
All these years later, my first pick for what to listen to in the car is the Christian contemporary music station. (Talk radio, even Catholic or Christian talk radio, is not my jam.) The practice helped me in the two years I lived in Washington D.C. area while driving to and from grad school and out on reporting assignments. While gritting my teeth through some of the rudest and most impatient driver interactions I’ve experienced, I’d turn up the tunes and let the words of forgiveness, compassion and God’s love wash over me.
I think listening to Christian music is even more important to me today because I often have my kids in the car. So many times, when I’ve tried scrolling between stations, I’ll hear DJs cracking crass jokes about dating, commercials shilling diet plans, and songs glorifying money and sex. Even the so-called Family Pop station on Apple Music slips some questionable songs onto its playlist. When you’ve got little ears in the car with you, all the lyrical minutiae you might have glazed over before really stands out.
So, this Lent, I’m going to fast entirely from secular music when I’m in the car by myself. My kids often request upbeat tunes from secular artists that help get them in better moods, so I won’t force my fast on them. But I’ll keep defaulting to the Christian contemporary station unless they ask.
I’m interested to see if this helps assuage my everyday angst a little more and focus on preparing for Jesus’ death and resurrection.
Anna Weaver is the Hawaii Catholic Herald’s associate editor.
