We all know that pride is a deadly sin, but can it also be a virtue? I’d say yes. There’s a good side to pride. The question a spiritual director might ask to see which side of this you’re on is this: “Are you too proud or are you not proud enough?”
I’d like to make the case that a lot of people are not proud enough. We need to explore growing in that good kind of pride, namely, love of self, and worry less about being too proud. We all have a certain amount of ego, which is OK, because without it we might become doormats for others to walk all over us.
A good kind of pride is when we have self-respect and self-love. We have to love ourselves, and remember that one of the commandments tells us to “love your neighbor as you love yourself.”
On the other hand, excessive love of self is mortally sinful. In discerning the difference, the key word is “excessive.”
The Bible tells us the story of the angels who fell from grace. The Bible places blame on their excessive love of self. They became so blinded by pride that they defied God’s sovereignty. They rebelled against God and did not want to obey.
How could angels be so ungrateful to their maker? They showed excessive love of self, lost their humility and became blind. Their hatred for God was so intense that they rebelled against him.
That’s why humility is such a powerful virtue. Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking about yourself less.
However, there is the good kind of pride, which is self-love. You should love yourself more and take pride in your accomplishments precisely so that you can steer away from any sign of self-rejection. Never put yourself down.
Self-respect is the reward of a meaningful life. This love of self is a holy virtue. Being patient with your shortcomings and peccadilloes is a way of respecting yourself without focusing too much on your faults. It’s good to be contrite, yet we should move on and not wallow in the past.
But where is the fine line, how does one have enough pride and avoid excessive pride?
We need to recognize that we are children of God, who are loved by God and also have a duty to love ourselves. But we should also find humility in the fact that we owe God life, and that we need to serve him gratefully.
